Ling Siew Kim’s Testimony 林秀金的见证
信耶稣以前我我是一个多愁善感的人, 经常忧虑许多的事, 忧虑女儿的工作、母亲的健康, 心中许多的重担, 工作遇到老板的责备就很懊恼, 不开心的时候经常发脾气, 生活一天过一天, 非常的平淡。
我信主的妹妹经常向我传福音, 劝我不要为生活忧虑, 要向耶稣祷告, 祂会帮助我. 我就开始学习祷告, 祷告后心情比较放松, 很感谢耶稣听我的祷告, 后来女儿工作比较顺利、母亲的健康也比较稳定. 妹妹也鼓励我看圣经; 约翰福音3 : 16 “神爱世人, 甚至将祂的独生子赐给他们, 叫一切相信祂的, 不至灭亡, 反得永生.” 我认识了耶稣是救主, 相信祂得永生. 后来我开始在教会上基督教教育课程, 认识到我在思想与行为上有得罪神的, 我必须认罪, 求耶稣赦免我的罪并接受祂做我的救主与生命的主. 明白了什么是信耶稣, 妹妹就邀请教会的传道到我家为我做决志信耶稣的祷告。
信主后, 我的生命有许多的改变, 我想我既然信耶稣. 我必须像耶稣, 要宽恕人, 不要计较别人的过错. 于是我就祷告, 求耶稣帮助我. 我渐渐变得比较乐观、开朗. 从此, 我积极读经祷告, 继续参加教会的聚会还有上课, 更多的认识神, 了解神的教导. 我今天接受洗礼, 在撒旦、上帝与众人面前宣告我已经接受耶稣为我的救主与生命的主, 一次相信永远相信. 阿门！
Zac Low’s Testimony 刘子杰的见证
Growing up, I was no stranger to bible stories and hymns like “To be like Jesus”. While I did profess Christ as my Lord and saviour when I was 10, as a young child I still thought to be like Jesus meant being perfect. So I tried, I aimed to be polite, said my please and thank you’s, obeyed my parents, and tried to eat my vegetables.
But as I got older, I realised there was one thing that I couldn’t control: My thoughts.
I tried to fix it on my own, thinking that if I scrubbed hard enough, the sin would go away. But an eraser can never erase what’s permanently written in pen. So I began to take more “extreme measures”, imagining or burning the thoughts away, hoping that would work, but the more I fought, the more bad thoughts plagued my mind.
So I began to wear masks, not just to fool others but to fool myself. I became a version of myself others expected to see.
I thought, if I looked like a good christian boy, that must mean I was one.
Things started to change in JC2 during Timothy fellowship when we went through “The Gospel Centered Life” by Thune and Walker. One thing that stood out to me was the Cross chart.
I didn’t fully get it then, but it planted a seed.
Years later, I realized I never grasped how broken I was.
Sure I hadn’t done any of the “bad stuff” that would get me into serious trouble. But the issue wasn’t my outward behavior, it was my heart. My pride. My self-dependence. I had convinced myself I was “okay” but in reality, I was a hypocrite. That realization hit hard.
At that point in time, I thought it would be hard to see God’s holiness, so I asked God for the opposite: to be able to see my own sinfulness. I thought maybe if I knew what was wrong, I could fix it and be good enough, no need to be perfect anymore, just… enough.
Did I really know what I was asking for? No.
But God answered and began exposing the dark corners of my broken, sinful heart, even places I didn’t even want to admit were there.
My life went from a seemingly straight line to a super wavy line
But even in that mess, I began to understand Romans 3:23 that “All have sinned and fall short of the Glory of God”. I couldn’t fake or hide it anymore. From the beginning, I was and still am, a sinner through and through. And no amount of effort could save me. This problem was something I never could fix on my own and never will.
At that point, I began to doubt. Could God really love someone like me?
That’s when Romans 5:8 hit me differently: “But God demonstrates his own love for us in this: While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.”
Not when I got better.
Not when I finally became ‘good enough.’
But while I was still broken.
Because of God’s great love, He gave His only son, the only truly perfect man, Jesus Christ. Who took the punishment I deserved by dying on the cross. And three days later, His resurrection proved that He truly is the Son of God.
And because of that, I found a new kind of rest, not a false sense of security propped up by my own effort, but a deep peace in knowing that even when I fall short, I am already forgiven, because the work is finished.
Now, when I strive toward Christlikeness, it’s no longer out of guilt or to prove my worth, but as a response to His love, not relying on my own strength, but His.
While my journey so far hasn’t been a dramatic overnight change, that’s okay. God, in His love, has been guiding my steps, growing me through both the highs and the lows. And now, I no longer need to wear a mask but I can be authentic and genuine with others.
So, please pray for me, that I will continue to maintain my focus, fixing my eyes on Jesus and when I fall, to get back up again, persevering till the very end. All in all not forgetting that it is also He who holds me fast.
As part of the body, to grow and spur others on in Christ-likeness and by His spirit, to be continuously sharpened to proactively emulate Christ, this time, from the inside, out.
In short, to be like Jesus.
For His glory and my good.
Amen.
从小我就对各种圣经故事耳濡目染，也常常唱诗歌，比如《要像耶稣》。虽然我十岁那年就承认耶稣基督是我的救主但我以为 “要像耶稣” 就是言行举止要做到最完美。于是我尽我所能：要有礼貌、说 “请” 和 “谢谢”、听父母的话、乖乖吃蔬菜。
但随着年龄渐长，我发现有一件事是我完全无法控制的：我的思想。
我尝试靠自己解决，以为只要足够努力地“擦干净”，罪就会消失。但用橡皮檫是无法擦去已经用墨水写下的东西。所以，我开始采取一些“极端”的方法，比如试着在脑海中 “烧掉” 那些想法，想看看是否奏效。但越是挣扎，那些负面想法反而越缠绕我。
于是，我开始戴上 “面具”，不仅是为了骗别人，也是为了骗我自己。努力表现得像一个“好基督徒”的样子。
我以为，只要看起来像是个好的基督徒，那我就真的是了。
直到我十八岁时，在提摩太团契里，我们一起查考《以福音为中心的生活》（The Gospel-Centered Life）这本书，其中有一个“十字架图”（The Cross Chart）让我印象特别深刻。
当时我还不完全明白，但它在我心中埋下了一颗种子。
后来，我终于意识到，我从来没有真正认识到自己有多破碎。
我或许没有做什么 “大错事”，没有闯祸。但问题不在于外表的行为，而是在我的内心；我的骄傲，我的自恃。我一直说服自己 “我还好”，但其实我是个假冒为善的人。这个认知对我打击很大。
我以为，要看见神的圣洁有点难，于是我向神祷告，求祂让我看见自己内心的罪恶。我认为，只要我知道哪里错了，就可以自己去修复，不需要完美，只要 “够好” 就行了。
当时的我知道自己在求什么吗？其实，我不知道。
但神回应了祷告，祂开始显明我心中那些黑暗的角落。甚至是我自己都不愿意面对的地方。
我的生命轨迹，从一条看似直的线，变成了一条崎岖波动的曲线。
但也正是在这混乱当中，我开始真正明白罗马书3章23节所说：“因为人人都犯了罪，亏缺了神的荣耀”。 我无法再假装，也无法再隐藏。从一开始，我就是个罪人，现在仍是。而且，无论我多努力，都无法靠自己解决这个问题。
就在那时，我开始怀疑：神真的会爱像我这样的人吗？
这时，罗马书5章8节以全新的方式触动了我：“唯有基督在我们还作罪人的时候为我们死，神对我们的爱就在此显明了。”
不需要等到我变好了， 也不是等我变得 “够好”， 而是就在我仍然破碎的时候。
正因着神伟大的爱，祂赐下了祂的独生子，耶稣基督，唯一真正完全的人，代替我承受应得的惩罚，为我钉在十字架上。三天后，祂从死里复活，显明祂真的是神的儿子。
正因如此，我得着了一个全新的安息。这不是靠自己努力营造出来的虚假安全感，而是一种深深的平安。知道即使我再一次跌倒，我已经被赦免了，因为救恩的工作已经完成。
如今，当我竭力追求效法基督，不再是出于愧疚或想证明自己的价值，而是出于对祂的爱，是一种回应。我不再倚靠自己的力量，而是靠祂的大能。
虽然我的属灵旅程并不是一夜之间就翻转改变，但没关系。神在他的爱中一步步引导我，无论在高山还是低谷中塑造我。现在，我不再需要戴上面具，而是可以真实地、坦然地面对人。
所以，请你们为我祷告，求主帮助我持续定睛在耶稣身上，跌倒时能重新站起来，持守信仰直到最后。我要记得，不是我抓住祂，而是祂一直在扶持我。
作为基督的肢体，愿我能继续在基督里成长，并激励他人追求效法基督，同时也愿圣灵不断地磨炼我，使我从内心开始，真实地活出基督的样式。
简而言之：要像耶稣。为着祂的荣耀，也为我自己的益处。
阿们。
Zann Low’s Testimony 刘子岩的见证
My childhood was quite a simple one. My parents were Christians who brought me to church every week where I would usually attend Chinese Sunday school, which honestly felt more like Chinese tuition. During sermons, I’d be at the back of the hall sleeping under the bench on the floor or folding origami completely in my own world, not really paying attention or understanding what was being said.
I wasn’t exactly the perfect son, nor was I trying to be. I understood what I should do, but I never really bothered. I was probably the most rebellious one at home, got caned a lot for doing all sorts of bad things, and generally didn’t like doing anything except what I wanted.
From early on, I was exposed to what it meant to be a Christian through church and I understood the idea that Christians shouldn’t lie, must obey their parents, and should honour God. But I never really lived that way so I just followed my parents to church and only thought about God during those times.
I generally enjoyed reading books, and around Primary 6, My school introduced this Manga Bible series (Annex 1). Which i really enjoyed as It helped me visualize biblical stories and really sparked my interest. I remember asking my parents to buy the whole series , which I read multiple times. It really helped me in familiarising myself with the biblical events which was helpful for Sunday school, especially when we went through familiar stories.
After my PSLE, in Primary 6, my dad posed a very intriguing question to me which was “Do you believe in Jesus as your Saviour?” At that time I said yes instinctively, without thinking too much about it. But the next day, while walking across the school plaza on my way home after playing Uno during the post-exam period, I was struck with a moment of realization of how much of a hypocrite I was. I called myself a Christian, told others I believed in God, went to church but I didn’t live like one. I didn’t even understand what it meant to believe in God. I realized I actually knew nothing about God which brought me into despair and fear of going to hell.
This sparked a desire in me to want to know more, I wanted to know God for myself. I already had a bit of understanding from the Manga Bible and Sunday school, but I wanted to know what the Bible really said to see if there was more information or details I had missed from the summarised Manga bible series. So from around October of Primary 6, I started reading the Bible from the old testament (Genesis) till the new testament (Revelation) (skipped Deuteronomy cause I couldn’t take it when i was young, too long) and, at the same time, I also wanted to change my behaviour starting with trying to stop lying and swearing.
It was also around this time that I tried listening to sermons more intentionally instead of sleeping (still happened very often), especially during bilingual services. I paid more attention during Christian Education (CE) lessons and was invited to join a cell group called Timothy Fellowship (TF). All these helped me grow in my understanding of who Jesus really is and what He has done for me. As I learned more about God, I also began to see more clearly my own sinful nature and tried to slowly correct my attitude.
After about three and a half years I finished the bible then. I reflected on what I had done the past few years and realised that honestly not that much has changed, I knew about God, but I didn’t know God but I also didn’t know what else I could do so I decided to read the Bible again but this time trying to do more reflecting and absorbing of his word instead of plain text reading.
Around 2020 – 2022 during the second read through of the bible along with what I learnt from TF, Sunday school and sermons where I understood more about the attributes of God and the more I learned about God and His holiness, the more I became aware of my sin and I saw how much grace God has given me to be allowed the chance to be saved which highlighted to me how much I needed Jesus in my life. This was when I truly accepted Christ into my life as my Lord and Saviour but as much as I accepted Jesus into my life this also marked the start of a lot of doubts, questions and struggles as to what it means to live out the faith or to follow Jesus. In my heart I struggled with the idea of grace that salvation is a free gift from God through Christ and not something I could earn through effort or good works which took awhile for me to accept.
And in my head the question I had was how true is the Bible, because having grown up with all these stories, the most important question to me was knowing whether what I read was actually true. Because if these bible stories were all true, then there would be no doubt that God was real.
I searched for external sources to verify the truth of the Bible, many of which cited all sorts of credible historians. But eventually, I realised that I’m not a historian myself, and I don’t actually know who these “credible historians” are. Believing them would still require a certain level of trust just like believing the Bible. In the end, it didn’t really help in convincing me, because it still came down to choosing what and who I was willing to trust.
Then I started looking into reasons for God’s existence. I remember a Sunday school lesson (it happened much later but I already had a rough and not fully fleshed out idea of this then) that summarized what I had been thinking about: “The probability of God’s existence.” It categorized arguments such as:
- The order and complexity of the universe (The universe and life exhibit intricate design and fine-tuning, it is more probable that the order and complexity of this universe is a result of an intelligent mind/designer (God) vs the universe came about by chance.)
- Life begets life (Life only comes from life, it is more probable that in the beginning God, who is life, gave life vs in the beginning, matter came into contact with some random energy sources or lifeless matter and evolved into life-forms.)
- Moral absolutes (Most humans recognize objective right and wrong, it would be more probable that there must be a moral lawgiver who placed these rights and wrongs inside of us.)
- Love and selflessness (Acts of sacrificial love, altruism, and compassion are often irrational from a survival-only view, If we are just evolved animals, survival of the fittest will be our greatest ethical compass and therefore, it would be more probable that we would prize self-interest above selflessness.)
- Question after death (Humanity’s preoccupation with life after death, If we are just evolved beings, we ought to be just thinking about this life because there is nothing for us in the next life. But we keep asking: “What’s in the great beyond?” There is this innate sense that we must answer to somebody with regard to how we live our lives. This preoccupation makes it more probable that there is more to this life than just energy and matter.)
These understandings, along with my own personal experiences with God, assured me much more of His existence and prompted me to pursue Him more personally and not just intellectually.
As I was about to enter polytechnic, I spent a lot of time reflecting and I noticed the tendency I had to live as a Sunday Christian; someone who didn’t think or talk about God outside of church. I wanted to shift my direction. I wanted to know God, not just know about Him. I felt the best way to experience God was to immerse myself in Him, to put myself in situations where I would need to rely on Him and be reminded of Him.
So, I joined a Christian community in school called Cru, which had a Discipleship Group (DG) that helped me grow in perspective by surrounding myself with people outside of my church community. It gave me the space to talk about God with others who had different backgrounds and experiences. Joining Cru had a great impact on me as it helped me to involve God more intentionally in my academic life as well as throughout the week. Through this community I was encouraged to explore new ways of serving and trusting in God through mission trips, evangelism, teaching, speaking, and leading. While each of these came with its own struggles they also helped me to experience God more personally.
Through these experiences, God has shown me just how much He cares for me and His people in different parts of the world. I have come to see how patient God has been with me, guiding me, teaching me and drawing me closer to Him even as I stumble through life. As I continue to follow Jesus, I want to obey His Word and follow Him. And for me, in this stage of life, baptism is the next small step of obedience that I believe God is leading me towards. Please continue to also journey with me and pray for me as God continues to reveal to me my shortcomings as I seek to live a life increasingly centered on Christ.